Irish Blogger Gathering: Tailgate Edition

Welcome to Bad Trade, home to this week's Irish Blogger Gathering!

Tempting though it was to devote this week's IBG to a certain Molder of Men, I figured I would give the guy an undeserved break, and go for a topic near and dear to my heart - the tailgate party.

As Homer Simpson once said: "We're not here for the game - the game is nothing, the game is crap, the game makes me sick! The real reason we Americans put up with sports is for this: Behold! The tailgate party! The pinnacle of human achievement! Since the dawn of parking lots, man has sought to stuff his gut with food and alcohol, in anticipation of watching others exercise."

While I may disagree with Homer's opinion on the game (sometimes), I have no quarrels with loving a good tailgate party. Plus, the Notre Dame tailgate experience is on everyone's mind these days. And so, without further ado, this week's questions.

1. You're having some beers and brats outside Notre Dame Stadium, just chilling with friends. If you could have one Notre Dame player or coach drop by to share a drink, a brat and some stories with you, who would it be?

I considered going with someone long dead, but then I realized I wanted to have a chat with someone of a more recent vintage - Lou. You know he would have some great stories from his days as coach that he doesn't normally tell to alumni groups or the like, and he just seems like he would be able to kick back, chill, and fit right in with whoever showed up that day to tailgate. Plus, how cool would it be to say that Lou stopped by your tailgate?

2. What was your best experience ever with a tailgate party?

I forget who said it, but I remember hearing a quotation from someone talking about the perfect sorts of evenings that you can only have at a bar - where everything, for a short moment, is absolutely perfect, and you are keen enough (after a couple drinks) to realize how perfect things are for you. I had one of those moments at the 2005 Notre Dame game at Purdue, during my last year in law school. Having discovered how much the Purdue tailgate scene sucks two years earlier, a few friends and I headed down to West Lafayette early in the morning to snag a spot on someone's front yard, overlooking Ross-Ade. By midday, most of my close law school friends were lounging around the tailgate, drinking, eating, and just enjoying a beautiful day. We watched other games on a neighboring tailgater's television and sold exorbitantly priced cases to some Purdue fans who ran out of beer. There wasn't anything overly special about the tailgate, but it was exactly how I picture a good tailgate in my mind, and that made it perfect.

3. There are lots of great tailgate experiences around the country - what school's tailgate tradition do you most want to experience?

The list of places I want to go and tailgate is about as long as the list of places one can go and tailgate. However, there is one place that I have wanted to experience since a South Carolina fan told me about it a few years ago - the Cockaboose! Sure, it's not the most traditional experience ever. And it's not tailgating in the sense of eating out the back of your car before a traditional rivalry game. But I love the idea of sitting around in a caboose before a game, watching television and sipping a cocktail.

4. Indiana decides that their drinking laws are far too un-draconian (I'm from Wisconsin. I don't understand these things like "kids aren't allowed in bars," "your parents can't give you liquor if they are supervising" and "no alcohol purchases on Sunday"), and drinking is now forbidden on Saturdays. The Excise Police stop by your tailgate, and proceed to dump out the liquor you were attempting to hide from them. What do they pour out?

Well, the Guinness went long before the Excise police showed up. There's at least one bottle of scotch still about half full, my pre-mixed margaritas, that bottle of hurricanes that I have been carrying around for two years that no one has ever drunk, and SoCo punch. And a lot of Miller Lite and High Life, for use in various drinking games.

5. OK, I couldn't leave it alone completely. How do you feel about the impending end of the Coach Willingham era at Washington?

Fine. Just fine.