Non-Preview Preview - Michigan

The obligatory blog preview of the upcoming season, Sarah-style (i.e., the style for someone too lazy to preview teams properly).

Player Name Least Likely to Scare People: Bobby Centlivre. It means 100 books in French. Nothing scary about that (unless you’re a Michigan kinesiology major).

Obligatory Song for the Tailgate Mix: In honor of Appalachian State, I will go with a song best remembered for its video featuring an animated cat/cat-resembling creature:

Sport Michigan Sucked At Last Year: Women’s soccer, with a 3-9-6 record. This record includes such exciting games as a 0-0 tie with Notre Dame. And yet, people still try to convince me that soccer is not boring. To quote King of the Hill, “I’d rather be on a losing football team than a winning soccer team any day.”

If You Come Here, You Can Major In: Kinesiology! Okay, that’s too easy, even for me. How about Jazz and Contemplative Studies? I have visions of people smoking weed, listening to jazz, and having profound thoughts, all for credit (obviously). I also assume that most of those profound thoughts have to do with the complete and utter lack of discipline in the kinesiology department.

Neighbor of Mine Michigan Most Resembles: The dude with the Mustang. It’s his new baby, and he washes the thing at least twice a week. If anything you say or do can be construed as an insult to the Mustang (such as wearing a Corvette tank top out to your own car while he happens to be washing his car), you will get an earful at an abnormally loud level about the superiority of the Mustang to every other car in the world – except some classic Mustang that his dad used to drive. I avoid Mustang dude at all costs.

Mustang = Rich Rodriguez. Old Mustang = Bo Schembechler. It’s an uncanny resemblance, right down to the over-reaction at any perceived slight.

Random Conclusion Unrelated to the Game Itself: This is still one of my all time favorite commercials. Does it have anything to do with Notre Dame? Nope. Do I care? Nope.